.

elucubrare:

lemon-geesus:

gweenday:

young man, the groomsbride is a whore i said young man, please close the goddamn door

this is it

the post that is simultaneously the best and worst post in existence

groom door hand whore bride door

(Source: touristhistorycat, via imtheone-shes-walkingto)

justacunninglinguist:

cobaltdays:

*strokes my laptop camera three times until the fbi agent comes out in a cloud of smoke*

me: hi! how many wishes do I get? :)

fbi agent: what in god’s name did you just do to me

this meme is so stupid but cracks me up

(via handjob)

technicolor-vision:

sstudyblr:

thequeenofsunflowers:

wellyfullofale:

I think next thursday is gonna be the best day of my entire life tbh

reblog for next thursday to be the best day of your life

not risking it

I like how this post didn’t threaten me or my mother if I did not reblog…very wholesome. Have a great Thursday

(via nerd-with-a-nipple)

racial:

racial:

might fuck around and drink the daily recommended amount of water

i have to pee

(via homophobic)

jaunes-hoodie:

krwzprtt:

enochian-dick-jokes:

broke-broken-breaking:

prokopetz:

If you’re trying to catch a housecat that’s gotten outside, don’t forget: they’re an ambush predator and you’re a persistence predator. You have several times more endurance than they do - use that to your advantage! Don’t run after them; that’s playing to the cat’s strengths, and vigorous pursuit may cause them to hide. Instead, follow them at a brisk walking pace until they get tired and need to have a lie-down, at which point you can simply pick them up and take them home.

Ok but no shit this tactic is what allowed humans to survive pre-civilisation

Some mammoth: *chilling, eating grass, mammothing*

Cavedude: *power walks towards them*

Mammoth: oh sIHT

cat : haha you can’t outrun me

human:

That’s the best possible use of a gif I’ve ever seen

(via imtheone-shes-walkingto)

matesprit:

when all of your knuckles crack except one so you have to try and convince yourself to be a sensible human being and resist the urge to break your own finger

(Source: hurricaneclouds, via handjob)